Heavy-Hearted

To be exact, 1.5days left.. and here I am packing my stuff once again..
Somehow not just packing stuff but packing up the feelings too.
Feelings of wanna have more FUN here,

feelings of letting go certain things,

feelings of apart from some friends who will only be meeting back after dunno how many years (esp Jolynn & Yi Ling!),

feelings of back to class and study, feelings of forgive and forget,

feelings of uncertain.....

Aiyooo why is leaving things behind so HARD?! Why is leaving being so not easy for me anymore? I'm suppose to be 潇洒！！ =D haha

Awww there's still alot things on my "Must-To-Do-List" aren't complete! BBQ still pending T.T
Follow by Ampang Look Out Point and Broga and some outings with certain friends =(
I still owe an OT session with some of you =S

Peeps hold on some really GREAT AWESOME moment for 5months yo!!! Be back real soon!

p/s: really hate packing up!

Rewind . Playback

Time really is a hard-working, non-obedient fella. Non-stop ticking wishes it to stop it never will listen, wishes it to fast forward never will do so too. Yea it's almost time (about 4days+ more) and I will need to fly back to Melbourne start the hectic life all over again & face the reality.

It's funny when sometimes I wish I won't need to go back there that's because most of my precious friends all over here yet I really miss the FREEDOM I have over there. Anyway...... I have been hanging out with my Kwang Hua's and Taylor's friends. I miss all of you so badly!

As usual, this whole day been stoning at home and don't know why I just look back all the past photos in my photo albums. From teacher's day, graduation, trips, orientation, new year, random outings, SS15, birthday......to this month latest photos. Memories flashing back and forth in the mind whether it's good or the bad ones. Things I wish to delete, things I hope it happens again etc.... but the chances is next to zero. There are things I know it won't ever happen, been telling myself to give it up but sometimes the heart speaks louder than mind and words. It's torturing yet is a beautiful nightmare. Weirdo me right? =) I always know the answer for it just. . . Hey, I'm a mere human lar~!

Dunno why just suddenly flash-ed back all the stupid,funny, annoying things happen back then. Stupid jokes, illegal stuff we did, gossips, awkward moments, enjoyable pasts, argues, triumph, stuff, craziness and of course a lot a lot more. All these are unable to just being described through these typical wordings here. Some would say that enjoy before once is better than none but I'm a greedy person. I wish I can have it forever happening non-stop.[They are 1 of my precious =)]

Yea we had this name cos all of our surnames are the same! except our 5th member who wasn't with us that time =( if not it would be the perfect CORANGES! =D we had a great awesome playful time in Cotton On @ Bukit Tinggi =) Guess meeting u guys in another half year d.... Viewed back our previous photos rmb how crazy we were back then =) Really miss it!
Had insane moments with my others Taylor's pals! Best example is the Red Box so AWESOME!!!!

Sadly there's this 1 fren still unable to meet up GOH SOO KIT! Damn u lo always din come out! DNXDD Hahaha =p
Yea so now I left like 3 days to go out. Today suppose to hang out but my mum just not allowing me to go =( Hopefully Thursday and Friday I can hang out with some of you but yea I know the chances of it happening is VERY small. Still deep inside me, I hope it would happen, hope Jog for Hope not the last time I meeting ya'o. Ampang Look Out Point, Murni all we haven't go peeps!!

I wanna go out so badly! =')

放手 。 执著

人，
脆弱的心灵还是坚强的心呢？
人，
一旦陷入了就无法自拔地执著。。
执著于知道无法取得的东西，
物质，情感，友谊，幸福等等的。。。
天真还是愚蠢，
谁晓得？

继续执著，无法放手，
使得人不能迈进或重新开始，
又或许因贪，
不愿放手却想两得其美，
最终一无所得。。。

放手，是意志弱么？想重新开始么？
执著，是坚强么？又则是难以忘怀？
放手让人得以重新开始。。。
执著让人回味过去。。。
二者皆痛苦。

放手与执著，
二选一，您如何选着呢？


[not a good one :s just randomly feels like blog in Chinese where these 2 words came in my mind; feel free to critic =) ]

When Loneliness Hits

There are times when we are being left out...
There are times when you don't seem to fit in....
There are times when you're being ignored...
There are times when people forgotten about your existence...
There are times when people find you annoying...
There are times when things just don't seem right happens to you...
There are times when loneliness hits...
There are times when you found there's no one to help you...
There are times when you find friends who isn't ur friends...
There are time... ... ... ... etc etc & etc

Yea, there are surely times when you are feeling helpless and there's no one u can get to hold you up. But still it's part of life. Thus, sometimes born people who LOA and getting the attention. People who will then go towards depression and bla bla bla......

Nothing is perfect in life. Impossible not feeling lonely sometimes. Things never gone as you wanted but doesn't mean you are unlucky. Just you are experiencing something different from others. On the other hand, there are surely friends who can you call up and nag to when you are feeling lonely. There are friends who meant to be kept for life, friends who come and go, friends who find you when needed, friends who forget you when time pass.... Different people are all around us. It's just depends on how you treat the "LONELINESS" only.

There are times you need to hang out with people you can't fit in well for a certain period of time but yea no choice you gotta hold it on still. Feeling depress and stay away doesn't gonna help. So just be who you are and live the life. It's the best thing all of us can do. and yea I know talk is easy but still we gotta try it right? ;) Never know what it might turn out to be. People out there might be hating us so much but still smiling at us well who cares?! Life is urs no one get to control it!!!

*cheers* (inspiration from a fren)

The Colour Has Spoken

9th July 2011...somehow like a "life changing" day.
Not just Malaysia, but Singapore, Melbourne, Bangkok and many other Malaysians in different countries have showed their support on the Clean & Fair Election Rally. The massiveness of the sea of YELLOW has show response and determination of the Malaysians. Question, is this a chaos? NO! As stated it's a peaceful demostration but just couldn't get permission. Why? Isn't everyone long for Fair & Square? Would you just any of you wanted to be treated unfair? No right? If so what's wrong with showing out what people think it suppose to be? It's just like an awareness to the public to everyone to know the importance of being FAIR.

"If you have done nothing wrong, there's no need to fear about it isn't it?"

1 demo, dozens of road blocks, road closures, close down of the capital.. . . . are these really relevant? Furthermore there are people who blaming this rally that bring down their business, causing a heck of jam, postponed their trips etc.etc.etc... You should really reconsider what you blaming at then! There's a link I saw on Facebook showing 1 70+ years old grandma being totally soaked in wet and exhausted look in the end of the day due to the water cannon and other forces. What have she done to deserve this type of treatment? For like surely a 70+ years old grandma won't have the strength enough to fight a fully geared cop I suppose. There's another link I saw rather interesting too. The foreign news reporter questioning why is demo being totally restricted in a democratic country?! What a good question!

Conclusion, don't we have freedom on showing what we want? Isn't that's human's right? Besides it's come in peace(V) yo.

p/s: this post does not mean to shoot any party. Sorry if it's offensive.

Back To Where I Am

Yeap that's right! I'm backed to this Hot, lots of Mosquitoes Malaysia =)!
Ironically, I wasn't that looking forward of coming back here until I'm actually landed! I wanted to play over there as yea I'm still a freshie I wanna explore as much as I can but who knows I get all pump-ed up ever since I'm backed here to where I used to be..where I belong to.
25th June 2011, landed at LCCT so basically it's the 2nd week I'm here.

Pathetically, I planned lots of things but seems like can't fight fate isn't it? Sometimes things just doesn't go well as I wanted it to be. Redang the place I wanted to go so desperately ever since dunno how small kid I am back then. I planned it before my finals and during my finals enthusiastically hoping this would work out. Haiz.. who knows? It seems like it not gonna happen.

"Well moral of the story is...life's uncertain, no matter how welly the plan is there's always will have something that make it even more interesting. That's life."

Been 2 weeks and I am fully a 100% stone in the house. A bird long for freedom who being caged. Haha just able to went out hang out a few times. Hmm..1 movie,1 red box, 1 dinner, 1 mamak tmr, 1 slack hang out the next day, and the uncertain ones are KL,Redang, next movie, Cheras. . . . . How great If i could just hang out everyday with friends I have been wishing to meet them for so long! And there's this fren Jolynn I wanted to hang out as much as I can before she flying to Canada =( I'm so sorry for turning down so many times T.T Wish u understand ='( I miss time hanging out with u so much!!!! How great if I can make it to the poolside party and the Mist event haizzz...
Back at Melbourne, I'm free to go out any time any where just 1 problem, all the places are off EARLY!! Where the hell can I hang out at?!! Back here is such a big contradiction! Double layer of cage keeping me from banging outside =S How great if the freedom as in Melbourne apply in here too! haha =D

"That's why this is LIFE! Life never go as what we wish it would be, never is what we wanted it to be. LIFE is about how we turn from what we DISLIKE to what we LIKE"

Yea I know that theory but still I can't stop hating the fact that I'm not allow to go out here n there. Just doesn't like it no reason just that. I'm bad I know =)
Because of plans I tend to miss out this n that haha but yea No Tears No Gain ma have to accept it right?

Let's talk about the BRIGHT side! =D Yesh! it's about outings!!!!
I have been craving for karaoke!! OMG Finally not long after I'm backed get to go Red Box with a bunch of great and awesome friends! Shout, sing, dance and shout again for 4 hours + Wow super SONG ar!! Peeps when can we do it once again?! U guys are great! Then another friday the showing of Transformers 3!! Wootz bought 13 tickets on9 and watch it at Pavillion for the very 1st time! It's awesomeness!! Not just the movie but the cinema and also the people I went out with. It would even great if the spoiler not sitting next right to me! *u know who u are!* pff! Then is the leaving of Kuan Liang to Melbourne. Got out eating with other S6 frens. Btw awesome place to eat!! The pork ribs is super damn frigging AWESOME!! I don't mind to spend and eat there b4 I gone back to melbourne! And the so call 'dog food'? It's simply just awesome!! It's a total heaven!!! Hope that we manage to go Ampang Look Out Point, BBQ, Movies again people. I will be so missing all of you. Chung Hua frens our timing why all so boh ngam?!! T.T I wanted to meet u all so badly!!!!!!

I been imagine everything would be so GREAT even before I reach Malaysia but yea reality always kill it off haha. Part of Life ma~!

No idea what to continue. Will write again when Feels like doing so =) *cheers*